How Do You Measure a Son's Holiday Love For His Parents? In Teaspoons, of Course. And Tablespoons. And Quarter Tablespoons. And Quarter Teaspoons

I'm a little flummoxed how my older sister didn't believe me as I sorted all the measuring cups and spoons from the drawers in my mother's kitchen. "There's no way she has that many, Bryan," she said in a text. 

WAY. 

I had luck at Home Goods and found the drawer organizers I was looking for, simply because I didn't want anyone to slice their hands reaching in the draw to get items, as there are a good 40-50 cutting knives in the drawer....from generations of cutting meat, deer, fish, and the body parts that go unnamed in the basement. 

That's a joke. There's isn't a basement. There's a shed. 

Of course, with the new drawer boxes, I had to rearrange some which will be destiny for a "Jesus EFFING Christ, Bryan. Where the #$@#@ is my #@$@#$?" It goes with the territory. We're accustomed to it. 

I also found a nice sink stopper that is designed to keep water in the sink so the water doesn't leak into the drain before you're finished cleaning dishes. Amazing. It almost works too good - so much so that when I cleaned the vents on the floor and the fans in the bathroom, the pull of lint-fuzzies stayed in the sink water for almost two hours before I unplugged it.

There were also 28 bottle openers, a few antique Pepsi toppers to keep the soda from going stale, 32 potato chip clips (borrowed one for Karal's dog food), the birthday candles we couldn't find on her birthday (they didn't have wicks, anyway), and a good 14 cheese spreaders for cheesy posts like this. 

Yes, that's supposed to be an egg on the sink plug, not a daisy. 

Also, I pulled the vacuum out of my bedroom. Boy, that machine can suck the stars into its galaxy if it wanted to. Amazing strength. 

Today, I take Papi Butch to the stores to get gift cards, to the bank for holiday cash, and hopefully to a bar for a beer. All the unwrapping of presents that aren't his are a cause for a drink - besides that, it will give Mimi Sue a break from the television noise and confusion.

I think she told him he's to take out $10,000 per child. I'll work on that.